Deviancy!

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Saturday 26 March 2011

The Mystery Revealed

I doubt any of you figured out my big mystery ... even with the big hints I gave you ...

You want to know it?

Do you?!

I’M BISEXUAL!!!

What? You already knew that? No no, this isn’t the answer to your cryptic puzzle, its what I said to my family (or near enough) exactly 3 weeks ago.

That’s your answer.

The numbers were: days; hours; minutes; seconds.

... hence them all being posted at quarter past (except my last one).

It all happened at once. Me and Ariel had been planning to get my family together for one big meal (or drink tbh) where I could tell them all at once. This was quite important as someone would have been upset they were left till last.

Anyway, we had several chances and people kept bailing and cancelling etc, and it was the last chance before I would have given up and told them individually. But luckily, my Grandad’s birthday we went out for a meal and then just my close family went out for a few drinks.

Anyway, the night progressed and we all had fun, and we were sat down at a table, when we got talking about relationships and trust. So Ariel burst out that dad had a date and has kinda been seeing this woman, to my mum (jut a reminder, they are separated).

He could have been a lot more upset but he was planning on telling mum his own way, which would have included several more weeks procrastination preparations.

So mum said she was happy for him and that we had a circle of trust. I literally had to force people from disbanding, saying things like “HOLD ON” and “WAIT!!!”  and I took a gulp of cider and said ...

“you remember that I just got dumped? Well their name was Peter”.

They were all really supportive and were just a little concerned that I hadn’t told them earlier and I tried to explain how it had nothing to do with them, but more that some aspect of our relationship would change. They all did the naive and family thing and said ‘no it wouldn’t’, but it would. For the better though.

Then Ariel’s future (temporary) boss came into the pub with his jealous gf, and he bought a round. We got talking and because Ariel and this guy were talking, I thought I should distract his gf and we got on really well! We got talking about jealousy and insecurities and how its not that she doesn’t trust those two, but more like her brain tells her to be worried while her heart says not to worry. Like me and Peter. So I came out to them two, why not.

She ended up calling me 3 times that night and has told most of her friends about her new “bff”, but that’s another story for another night ...


Jack xx

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

Let me be the first to say "CONGRATULATIONS!"

Big step, Jack, big step. You can be proud of yourself for having the courage to take the leap. Now you can be all you are around the most important people in your life: your family.

Awesome, my friend!
Peace <3
Jay

A Wandering Pom said...

Hi there, Jack

Wow! Congratulations!

This is great news; you're now free to be yourself with your family as well as your friends. It's great that they're all so accepting too.

*hugs*

Mark

Wayne said...

It is great Jack that your family are being reasonable and supporting you. It is brave of you too cos people underestimate the guts it takes for young people to be honest about their sexuality. I want the day to come when young people don't have to agonise over their sexuality and it is no big deal. As for sexuality be sure to separate emotional attraction and sexual attraction when determining your gender preference. Lots of homosexual guys enjoy the company of women but the sex is always with males. I think true bisexuals who have an equal sexual urge for both sexes are relatively rare. Many gay guys have made the mistake of marrying women on the basis of emotional attraction and even having families, but when he is caught messing with guys he will find out how expensive and nasty divorce court can be, complete with child support and alimony. So for the long term being honest with yourself about your sexual urge is very important. Accepting your true sexuality is no guarantee of happiness in life cos there are so many other variables, but I believe it gives you a better shot. Not having to pretend around your parents and friends may expose you to some bigotry but it takes a lot of pressure and stress off you. Your sexuality is just one component of your life and you don't have to wear it on your sleeve; your personal life is not everyone else's business. Focus on school and your good friends and cooperate with your family. bfn - Wayne (big hugs!)

1q23 said...

Well done, Jack.

So that's it - the 'big one' - the one you'll never have to do again.

So here you are open and honest and can talk about stuff without having to watch what you say.

And, what's more, you've now got people around you at home who will back you up and understand your joy/grief/sorrow about your relationships so that telling anyone else outside the family is now so much less of an event - coz you know that even if that ever gets a bad reaction you can come home to understanding and support.

Isn't it just a huge relief that's you've done it?!

Anonymous said...

1 Congrats on telling everyone
2. I already knew you were bi :P *Cough Faceboook cough*

See you around Jack
Ethan

Rowan said...

Sorry im a bit behind on your posts, Jack, but well done. Seriously man, im glad your family were so great about it, it seems to matter not a jot :)

Rowan <3

Kemptoo said...

Congrats & sounds like the family are ok with it.

One hurdle down :)

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