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Sunday, 13 February 2011

Out with the Old and In with the New Part 3

So I finished tidying my room today, and it is CLEAN!!!

I mean, I’m not a messy person, but when you get to bed about 1am and get up at 6.30 you have to sleep as much as possible. Which leaves little time for doing those menial things like hang your clothes up. Besides, my room is so small when there is one thing on the floor, its ‘messy’, so I just leave it. And over time it piles up.

So I had a nice big spring clean. And after 3 days its finally tidy. Right now I can see my iPod and my mum’s CD Labeller as they are temporarily out. The rest has been filed away under ‘Junk’ in the filing cabinet that is my room.
From last time:
I even remember the game we played, over and over and over again. Its become so embedded into my mind that its the foundation for three of my novels. But that’s a story for another time
Well that time is now.

Its sounds corny and will make little sense to you ‘outsiders’ but it was my favourite game to play (still kinda is in a way) but after years of playing it its gotten quite detailed. Lets start with the basics.

I was originally a Pegasus Unicorn who could talk (why? To be explained in a later post) and eventually just turned into an elf. Matt was originally a pixie and then turned into an elf too. Both of these transformations were about the time we started painting Warhammer and became obsessed about elves.

So the basic story is that we are brothers who were princes to a fairytale kingdom. Complete stereotype I know. So we were brothers and ruled over this land fairly and evenly, defeating the enemies together. Each day was a different adventure, but I remember two additions to this story in particular.

Usually when we went swimming we played the exact same version, guaranteed. We were caught in a storm (the tidal wave section of the pool we have) and were swimming around the ocean being attacked by monsters, caught in rapids (as coincidentally there were rapids there) and washed up on land. This went on for the several hours we would be swimming for.

But this soon ended and I actually miss playing this titanic-inspired game whenever I swim.

The other times was around his dad’s house. He took me to a huge field nearby and I remember it like it was yesterday.

We were brotherly elves, as usual, only this time there was an evil sorcerer who was trying to take the kingdom! We fought our way to him, against the invisible fiends, no help was coming so we were alone. And along the way we discovered that there was an ancient stone that we needed to defeat him, hidden in a tree somewhere.

Then, all of a sudden, he cast a spell on my brother and he turned against me. A vicious battle ensued where we fought one another for what seemed like hours. I won and neither of us died. It ended in a cataclysmic battle for the stone hidden in a tree stump: that we later made our base.

Me and Matt were highly imaginative children. Once we got really into this game – I forget what its called – where you collected dragon figurines, castle pieces and army men to build your own kingdom and army to be attacked by dragons. There were about 6 or so sets to collect. I got three and he got three and we shared them.

Oh the fun we had.

Once we went around his nans house. We took over her house. We had about 3 castles dotted around her house, combining all of the sets we collected – much like Lego – and were attacked by dragons and then each other and then this mysterious fiend who keeps popping up.

Little was I to know that we were not in danger from this fiend, but other, more real ones, who would later become my ‘friends’.


The day eventually came where Me and Matt were drawn apart. Unlike what you hear in stories and tales, it happened overnight. I was ill one day I think, and when I was in school the next day, Matt had made some new friends.

I was ok with this, I didn’t mind sharing my one friend.
I was a kind of lonely kid :/
But these new friends wanted to do other things. Things I wasn’t into. Like football. I didn’t see the point in kicking a ball around for 20 mins. There was absolutely no achievement from that! So I spent the next week or so wondering around the playground trying to make new friends and playing on the jungle-gym.

It wasn’t fun.

So eventually I relented and played football. It was no way near as amazing as people made it out to be, but it wasn’t as bad as I thought it would be. I made some new friends and had some fun. We formed a little group of five. One of which I’m good friends with now (I sit next to him in Media) and one I still pine for.

So over the years we tried different things, Warhammer, football, ect.

But the day came when we moves to secondary school. We were only 11 at the time and different schools, and living ‘so far away’ as we did it was a real strain on our relationship. We tried out very best.

We called each other once a week on a Saturday for hours upon hours. WE talked about our week. Our home life. Our hopes and dreams. We even did our French homework together! But as time moved on, we grew further apart and the phone calls stopped.

He now goes to my college and I hardly ever speak to him. I found out last year he moved across the road from me. He is literally one street over and never told me. I used to unknowingly stare at his house while waiting for the buss.

When I found out I tried to get our friendship going again: inviting him over, hosting parties so that we could hang out, becoming friends with his, ect. But 6 years is just too long and now I’m at my whit’s end.

I miss my bff like none other – I’m sorry baby but its true, just like you and Jake – but I don’t think I’ll ever have him back. Its just a pain I’ll have to live with, like many more


Sorry for the long segment, but I didn’t want to rush this. He was is my best friend FOREVER and I’ll always love him. Its the least he deserves.

Jack xx

P.S. Hello to my 3 new followers :)

P.P.S. Peter's been having some bad dreams lately :( so try to cheer up babe because ...


Anonymous said...

What did you do to your text color? I had to copy the whole thing to a text editor so it was readable! Please fix it!

But wow. I've read the story of you and Matt. I hate it when friends draw apart like that. I've got sooo many that fall into that category - so close and yet so far. How many times do you have to be ignored when you say "hello" to realize it's over? It makes my heart ache, too, Jack, so in that we have something in common. The biggest difference is that my bff passed away about 3 years ago. I've been sad ever since.

I'm sure it's not easy to write this, but I hope that getting it "out there" helps with the healing.

And fix the font color! PLEASE!
Peace <3

Jack xx said...

Thanks Jay, at least i know i'm not alone :L

And i fixed it, forgot to check the post once it was done lol :) xx

Wayne said...

When we get older it gets harder to remember the joy of our childhood imagination, when anything was possible. I do remember the smell of the earth and grass cos we were always rolling around in it. As for football the main point is to get some exercise and some bonding with other guys. But what you haven't mentioned is Matt's sexuality. Sometimes it is just that after puberty young guys' male friends are quickly sacrificed in their pursuit of girls, so don't take it personally. When guys have steady gfs or get married, close friends can only hope to be acquaintances at best. Girlfriends or wives can be very protective of their intimate relationships and keep a short leash; they view their husbands' close friends as threatening. If Matt has a history of girlfriends and is totally str8 then unless he is really gay-friendly he may feel uncomfortable around you cos you know him intimately. If he is totally str8 then you may be flogging a dead horse in trying to revive your close friendship. If you meet him again say hello and wish him all the best. If you find out he is not into girls, well then get in his face and have a talk. I do remember how heart-breaking it was to lose so many of my good friends to women over the years; back then many young gay guys got married out of fear. Do check out the young gay guys in your area Jack, cos these are the people who understand you (like Peter) and are your community in the long run. Tell Peter to dump those fears and anxieties cos they are illusions. There are a lot of perks to being gay, and freedom that a lot of str8 guys envy. bfn - Wayne :) (get more sleep Jack!)

Jack xx said...

Haha, sorry i forgot to put his sexuality, it ist a big thing (even if i think i had a crush on him once :/)

But he is straight. He had sex with one of my friends and i then had to hear about her moan about how he doesnt want to date her. There is a back-story here lol, he isnt a douche.

As for your theory that we were split apart due to sexuality is flawed. I didn't realise i was bi/gay/whatever until about 2 years after we split up. I had more girldfriends then he did haha.

And he is gay friendly, he is bff's (still) with our friend who is like stereotypically camp(but he's actally str8).

As for my local gays, there arn't many. I know a few gay people, both are either clingy or OTT, but i have my bi friends <3 lol

Jack xx

P.S. I know football is for excerscise and sport, but i just felt there were better, more productive ways to do that haha.

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