Confronting the Confused: Return to the Land of Blogging

Monday 29 August 2011

Return to the Land of Blogging

Hey Guys,

So um, as promised i have returned to the land of blogging. On schedule too ... if i'm not mistaken (which is a rarity of me)

Ths is just going to be a short post saying hat i am well and everything because i have some big posts planned for the next few days explaining all.

But in the mean time i jsut wanted to appolagise for what happened. I am sorry that i did it and that i had to put you all through it, it was selfish of me and wrong, so i'm truely sorry.

I also want to extend a massive thank you to Peter and Brad, who have been my connection with all of you guys. They not only updated my blog but they updated (or created) their own, about my condition and everything, so thank you and please give a round of applause to them, they deserve it...

[holds for applause]

and if you havn't already, please pop on over to their blogs:
Peter's
Brad's

So um, i think thats it. Sorry and thank you (again) and talk soon xx

11 comments:

naturgesetz said...: Glad to have you back blogging!

:); 29 August 2011 at 16:53
Roop said...: No need to apologise. I'm so glad you're back,
Roop.; 29 August 2011 at 17:06
Anonymous said...: I'm glad you are still among us. You gave everyone a very bad scare. I hope all your issues are under control now. I'll be watching for whatever you have to say.; 29 August 2011 at 17:17
A Wandering Pom said...: Hi there, Jack

Welcome back!

There's no need to apologise (though I appreciate that you did so) - I understand, from what you did, the extreme that you were driven to, and why it looked like the only way out for you. I very much hope that things are getting better for you now, both inside your head and with your family.

*hugs*

Mark; 29 August 2011 at 17:21
1q23 said...: I prefer you to the stand-ins, however nice and bony they are.

Welcome, er, back.; 29 August 2011 at 17:58
Bradhunter93 said...: hey its chill jack missed u while i have been settling in....my love; 30 August 2011 at 01:09
Wayne said...: You are an interesting guy Jack, so glad you are back posting. Hurricane Irene just missed us here mostly windy overnight. Beautiful day today though; bright sun and just a bit cool, perfect for biking. - Wayne :); 30 August 2011 at 01:11
Anonymous said...: Jack,
Knowing you are I do, I'm not surprised you are apologizing, but please know that none is necessary. You did what you felt you had to do, and although you may consider it a failure, it has helped you to get the help you'll need to not want to do it again, and to therefore find the happy life that you so richly deserve.

I am happier than I can ever express that you are still around as a friend.

You don't owe us any explanations, except those you wish to share to clear your own head.

Peace <3
Jay; 30 August 2011 at 03:34
tman said...: Feel the love, Jack! You were missed as you can see...

I know that you must have been in a lot of pain to consider such a drastic remedy, so I want to apologize to you for not seeing your despair even tho most of us have experienced the unrelenting feelings associated with loss and loneliness.

I remember a time when similar feelings gripped me and all of the friends around me kept saying that in due time, the raw edge of the pain would diminish and I would feel differently.

They were right, but at the time, I may have understood intellectually, but emotionally I didn't really believe... Heck, I didn't WANT to believe!

It took a few months for me to calm down and get back into a better frame of mind, and it really came down to a long discussion I had with myself about the importance of that one person in my life and the dependance I had attached to him. I never expected to lose him the way I did, but there was no way to change what happened... That's just the way some things happen in life. It was painful, and I needed to grieve and get my mind straight, and learn how to move on and open my heart to someone else. To love myself.

There has never been anyone to fill that part of my heart... Even tho he's no longer with us, he'll always own that special place. But, I also found out that my heart was big enough for other special people, and I knew that the last thing he wanted for me, was a life of loneliness.

I finally said goodbye, and took a deep breath and spent the days after that trying my best to find something good, the way he would have wanted.

It took a while, but when I was actually comfortable in my skin again, and not really even looking for another relationship, love 'intruded' in my life once more. I was scared, and tried to run, actually. ;P But, I was no match and for the next 15 years, I lived on the rollercoaster of great joys and occasional conflicts that is the result of sharing something so precious with another human being.

I'm sorry you felt so alone, Jack, but you really weren't. Be strong and have that talk with yourself at some point.

For me, it was a very enlightening conversation!! ;P luv, tman<3; 30 August 2011 at 22:36
Rowan said...: Glad you're back, Jack :)

Rowan <3; 31 August 2011 at 17:01
Anonymous said...: Missed you, Jack. Please don't leave us. :) - jeff; 1 September 2011 at 03:09